by kirk (special guest star)
May 6, 2001
We here at CSP get a lot of fan mail. We try to open and read every email and letter -
Okay. I can't do this. We got one email. Here it is:
Dear Clark Schpiell:
As always I've been laughing my ass off at your website! It's very
funny. I have been telling all of my friends and family and loved ones about it. I must say that some stories are very heart warming and quite beautiful. I emailed last year and I realized I was probably not received, for as my friend Paris Brannson (not real name) once said, "I am reading illiterate," I am computer illiterate and did not know how to use explorer. in fact, many of my messages have been returned. Currently, computer guru, Paul Lippold is helping me send my first successful email.
Well, as I said, I am a big fan of the site and the band! I'm quite
sure that is has nothing to do with my inside scoop on old masturbation and whipping stories...although they've given me insight, I'll not soon forget. I'm also sure that learning at a young age from Jeremy that, "if you wake up in the middle of the night and your arm is asleep, it totally feels like someone else," had little to no influence on my researching Clark Schpiell in the first place!
Simply, I am fan. I am not naked now. Nor, will I ever be. I do not
care for Cockroaches and usually am quite embarrassed to say the word out loud. It makes me feel, dirty and guilty. Also,...nevermind.
However, I am the bands biggest fan! Could I please get an autographed
t-shirt of the band!? I promise I'd wear it always and when people asked me "are you a head?" I'd say, "No. I'm a butt." And then, I'd say a bunch of other stuff, too. Please give Jason this note for me..."I know someone who thinks he's cute."
Kirk D. Roos